(11.01.2003)                                                                                         

Postman

It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same village.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family who all congratulated him on his retirement, thanked him for his years of service, and sent him on his way with a gift token for 100 pounds.

The second house gave him a case of fine 20 year old Scotch whisky.

The people in the third house gave him a wonderful fishing rod complete with all reels and tackle.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, brought him in, closed the door and gently led him upstairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love making that he had ever experienced.

When he couldn't take any more, she went downstairs and prepared him a giant breakfast of sausages, eggs and bacon and a cup of freshly brewed tea.

She brought the whole lot up to the bedroom and served him breakfast in bed.

After he had eaten, she poured him a cup of fresh coffee. While she was pouring he noticed a 5 dollar note sticking out from under the

cup.

"All this was too wonderful for words", he said " but what's the fiver for?"

"Well", she said, " last night I told my husband that today was your last day and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you".

He said, 'F*ck him. Give him a fiver.' "The breakfast was my idea."